When to send your invitations
Six to eight weeks before the wedding. That is the window for a wedding close to home, with guests who live nearby.
It works because it gives people enough notice to take time off and arrange travel, without being so far ahead that they put the card aside and forget about it.
Three things move that window:
- Guests traveling from abroad — send three months ahead so they can find flights at a sensible price.
- A wedding abroad — three months ahead as a minimum, with save the dates earlier still.
- A date near Thanksgiving, Christmas or a holiday weekend — add two weeks. Calendars fill early.
If you are sending save the dates
Six to twelve months ahead. A save the date is a heads-up rather than an invitation: your names, the date, the town, and a line saying the invitation will follow.
Send them only if your wedding is a long way off, or your guests need to travel. For a local wedding eight months away, you can skip them.
If you are sending them, ours sit with the wedding designs.
If you are sending files rather than mailing cards
Sending by message or email takes the mail wait out of the equation, so you can decide later than you otherwise would. Try not to. The six-to-eight week window is about how much notice your guests need, not how long the mail takes.
If you are printing at home or at a print shop, work backwards from your send date: allow a week for printing, and a couple of evenings for addressing envelopes.
When to set your RSVP deadline
Three to four weeks before the wedding. Early enough to chase, late enough to be fair.
Your venue or caterer will ask for final numbers, usually one to two weeks before the day. Setting your deadline three to four weeks out leaves you two weeks to chase the people who have not replied. There will be some. There are always some.
Write the deadline as a date, not a length of time. Please reply by March 14 tells someone exactly what to do. Please reply within four weeks asks them to work it out, and they will not.
What to put on the invitation
Six things, and nothing else:
- Who is inviting— your names, or your parents’ names if they are hosting.
- Who is invited — by name, in the greeting or on the envelope. This is how you say who is included without saying who is not.
- The date and time — the time the ceremony begins, not the time you would like people to arrive.
- The place — venue name and town. The full address belongs elsewhere.
- How to reply, and by when — one method, one date.
- Where to find the rest — your wedding website, if you have one.
That is the whole invitation. Everything else has somewhere better to live, and the card reads better without it.
What to leave off
- Gift lists. Asking for presents on the invitation itself reads poorly however warmly you word it. Put it on your website, or let your families pass it on when people ask — and they will ask.
- Full addresses and directions. Long lines of address text crowd a card that wants space around it.
- Timings for the whole day. Guests need the start time on the invitation. The rest they can read later.
- “No children.” Address the invitation to the people you are inviting, by name. If someone asks, tell them kindly and directly.
What goes on a details card instead
A details card is the second card that answers the practical questions: travel and parking, places to stay nearby, the shape of the day, and your website address.
Dress code sits happily on either. Put it on the details card if you want to explain it, or in one short line at the foot of the invitation if you do not.
A timeline you can work backwards from
- 6–12 months beforeSave the dates, if you are sending them
- 6–8 weeks beforeThe invitations themselves
- 3–4 weeks beforeYour RSVP deadline
- 1–2 weeks beforeFinal numbers to your venue